//OFFC/ The Day I Bought a Horse to the Office

This December we had nice idea to cheer up every Monday with a delicious cookies, cakes or anything else, done by me and my fellow colleagues, tirelessly contributing their free time for free to the greater good of the company.
First week's team managed to find one escape goat, who spend whole 6 hours of her weekend baking muffins, they were delicious. Call me scrooge, unmotivated or rebel but I don't see the point of wasting 6 hours for something you get no pay.
So, It turned out the time for my team (7 men and 2 ladies) to spend last bits of week's free time on baking. I can bake and I enjoy baking, but it seemed fundamentally wrong for me, so I passed, remaining 6 fellas were familiar with baking as much as our ladies familiar with oil change in the car, so it left only for our ladies. To be honest, both of them are manipulating, both of them try to get as much recognition and I was ready to continue by betting broker hobby...

\\TBB\ iQuit week one.

I never taught that my previous message in the bottle would get so much support and attention from so many people, who have nothing to do with me except they, their family members or their friends went down the same road I am heading to.
Thank you! When my office mates went outside to smoke, when I was waking up, thinking, that I need another cig, and many, many similar occasions It helped, that someone supports me.

"You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses" - so I will not whip myself for last three days of smoking few cigarettes. After all, I had kept myself from this deadly habit for three days. And I am ready to start over, learnt from my previous mistakes...

\\TBB\ iQuit

It's 4:55 AM, and I am tired of insomnia. The insomnia, caused by adrenaline, toxins and other chemicals, I've been inhaling into my body, and paying money for it. What was it worth for? When I was 15 yo, it was all about coolness, when I entered my twenties it was pure addiction. The nicotine, the smokes, the pseudo-socializing at work, when everybody keeps silent and at parties, when everybody craves for connection. I'm fed up with this. Today, I quit! My boss will get angry, because I will not go to work today, but really? Isn't Insomnia (even caused by self destructive behavior) not good enough reason? Well, I'm not betting on that anymore, as I did with previous job, I will simply go to my doctor and tell her how it is, actually I will lie, that I quit few days ago, so that she wont think it's some kind of idea fix, trying to get away from job. I will try to make her feel my last hope.

\\Random\ Little Red (Green) Corvette

Me and my colleague were standing next to the window and looking at policeman, approaching a dark sedan, stopped after loud desperate screams  coming down the street from megaphone, attached to police car.

\\Random\ A Cold Day in the Hell

Fate was mocking me, the same bad joke I'd heard a hundred times before. The setting had changed, but the rest was all too familiar.I couldn't remember the last time I'd felt anything but regret.All those failures I'd banked had been gathering interest. It had been so long since I'd seen a good idea, I'd forgotten what they looked like.This was the longest suicide attempt in history.In their faces I saw myself, the ghost of my mistakes. No amount of pills could numb this much pain. Every gunshot echoed in the

\\Dear Moleskine\ Why chicken crossed the road?

I noticed that in poor areas people tend to cross roads in less sharp direction than in richer areas.

More cars, less time to cross the road you think?

But think twice you expensive peace of paper! People in poor neighborhood cross road bluntly because the sidewalks are in worse condition that public roads. Always covered with holes and bumps, while rich areas are having nice and clean sidewalks. Why would someone care more about

\\Introduction\ Part II: About me and why are you reading this?

Bone under microscope. Looks like a sponge, right?

I am shy person, and to be honest, there is no one on this earth, whom I could tell everything. None of us have such person, when you are not a teen anymore. To be honest, you need a person or a place to yell everything out. Sometimes I feel like a sponge, full of dirt and water, just anticipating to let everything out, either clean soap or poisonous dirt.

And I do it from time to time, but we are highly competing species, and we tend to make fun of, destroy or manipulate people who trust us with their secrets, so I decided that I don't want to moan about my problems to girlfriend or buddies,

\\Random\ Psychology test when applying for driver's licence

I was eighteen at that time and I was believing that you got to be as manly as you can, what means attending gym twice or trice a week, buying a fast car etc. I see its still around five years later, I still see youngsters getting crazy about with they first cars and they should be, for most of them it's the highest point of life.

\\Introduction\ Part I: Money, the root of all evil.

Before I begin writing about money I would like to introduce you to the background I came from.

I was raised in a village near the capital of our country. I was born only one year after my homeland became independent from soviet union. And because of soviet union was collapsing, everyone was poor. Later I was told by history teacher that not everyone, few local communist party heads(well, more marionettes) and mobsters were rich, but there were times, when business was illegal, and since you are in the environment, where capitalism is sin, everyone is poor and those, who are considered rich have less than top notch western middle class.